As you may have been able to tell by the blog and my Instagram feed, it’s felt like a rough week. And by that I don’t mean that any of my loved ones have terminal diseases or we’re going bankrupt or our house has burned down in a fire, like, dial it down a notch, Sob Story Sally. I just mean we haven’t made it out much, we’ve been busy, I’ve listened to a lot of crying and been less Mary Poppins-ish than I wanted as I reacted to it.
I found this photo on my phone tonight, and wanted to post it here because I suddenly felt it will make me laugh hysterically one day. This photo is so absolutely right now, I could almost have done it on purpose. Stuff, everywhere. Henry wearing a cod-piece nappy he refuses to let me change, even though I tried to make it exciting by calling the changing mat the ‘magic circle’. Me, surveying the chaos from above with Teddy in one arm, and deciding just to take a photo rather than go down and tidy any of it up. This balcony over the living room that was the reason we bought the house and is now the reason we desperately need to move. I mean, what if Future Me is this super-efficient housekeeper, and forgets that once I was rashly, gloriously incompetent? Dear Future Me, today I accidentally read a book from beginning to end all morning, and when I cried about it on the phone to Timothy, he brought me home a bunch of flowers called Blackcurrant Smoothie. I started sorting out the boys’ clothes and only got halfway through it, like always, because Tim came home in the middle of it with Blackcurrant Smoothie and a bottle of Coke, and we ordered pizza and watched Modern Family. Dear Future Me, we were growing red pepper plants on that windowsill, do you remember? Two of the three are red now, and I keep meaning to cut them down, but can’t bring myself to do it in case they’re going to get sweeter still.
‘Henry, what are you doing on the chest?’ ‘Sleeping’. Right.
That beautiful, mad, infuriating boy I love so much it hurts my chest and he gets tired of me kissing those vanilla cheeks.
I need to remember this. I just don’t have any kind of sob story at all.